As we bring our subconscious sandbags to the surface of our consciousness; we can then address them, discard them, or simply DROP THEM! When our intended will syncs with the perfectly intended will of God, it becomes spiritually empowered. That merge brings a bolt of anointed energy and power.
"I Will" now step out of the ideas, skin, clothes, relationships, and worlds that no longer fit me.
"I Will" allow for the wisdom that is God to speak to every brick in my mentality surrounding food.
"I Command" for a new existence of evolved ideas about food to take root in my consciousness.
Whatever you do, keep your head high. There will always be those who thinks you should level your head, but that's only because they want to check your height. Over the course of this journey, I've really come to learn how much people really do height check, and several times I've been told to think less of myself. Of course you never hear this in these precise words, but with muteness, attitude, criticism, and the like. But I have refused. And I will continue to refuse. Why? Because my head up high does not interfere with anyone else's head up high. Furthermore, I need to see my Lord, and He sits on high. So, I just keep looking up... no matter what. And I want to encourage you to make no apologies for your pride, confidence, dignity, hope, vision, light, and joy. Don't do it! Go be awesome and remember, that the scale is not a measure of completeness. So, make your improvements, and let the scale rest a bit. Feel good, look good, think good, be good, do good, and goodness shall follow you all the days of your life. Thus says the Lord!
There comes a point after you've made "The Drop" that your attention falls onto fashion and you're ready to celebrate all that you've worked hard for. That year was 2016. I played with clothes and clothes played with me. I coordinated photo shoots, and I became Creative Director. I made my thrift finds look like treasure, and they made me look like a rockstar. I wore things I never really had the opportunity to wear, and I even tried and fitted a size eight skirt with a designer label. I wasn't as small as July 2015, but I was defined and I gave much definition to everything I wore.
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I am still pushing and striving to accomplish my body goals. As I continue, I am also working to empower others to achieve breakthrough by dropping the emotional load that overweight almost always symbolizes. As we loosen the grip we have on our baggage, we prepare our hearts and minds for weight loss success. From there we harness our mental power and direct it towards our hearts desire and suddenly our feet begin to move. This has been my experience and my ability to maintain my weight loss now for 2 whole years.
If you're still battling to get your clothes on and even go for a walk then the mind and the heart hasn't quite gotten on the same page yet. Continue to look at your thoughts to see and hear what's standing in your way. Keep tearing down walls and be loving with yourself. The breakthrough will come!!
When I first began, I just wanted to lose weight. I wanted to feel safe in my skin and I wanted to feel confident about my body. I never really thought about building muscle. After I lost my first 35lbs I began to see that there was a lot of things moving around more freely or giggling around and about that same time I began going to a group training where I was introduced to weights. It really helped me to get my skin back tight. Seeing this was so cool and rewarding. So just keep going. It's going to come together.
Most of my journey was detailed on my personal Facebook page so the process was clear. I think most people would associate my journey more with healthy eating than exercise and that is because I do believe that the eating is what got me where I was and it will be what keeps me here. I do go really hard in the gym because there is a lot of repair to be done; a lot of soft areas, stubborn fat, and still some disfigure to be overcome, but I understand that food is key. Many people use exercise as an outer manipulation for an inner issue and so I'm cautious to display an excessive amount of physical fitness. Funny there's so much of that around and people are still finding it hard to maintain. I was looking for lasting change and I've found it in eating mainly 1 ingredient foods. I am definitely more interested in the food conversation, however I'm certainly intrigued by the transformational power of physical fitness.
This picture was taken in July of 2011. I was not quite at my biggest but my many years of being significantly overweight is surely cataloged here. Almost three years before I decided to go rogue! This picture represents another kind of shift. I remember being in such a place of peace and acceptance with myself on this day. I was so open and free with the whole shoot. I wasn't overly worried about my size, what was bulging, or any other imperfections. I was truly present in the moment and that was because I had arrived at self acceptance. That's the unconditional part of self-love. So I definitely see it fair to note this moment.